There's gotta be a little rain sometimes............

No one promised me a rose garden. Not even close ...
I got now to the point when my life takes a turn. I don't want to, but it's a must not a prefferd thing. I met sunny days, when i felt like a queen, on top of the world, or at least on top of the situation. But there were also days of mourning for my failures and nights in tears feeling abandoned and empty. No one can have it all perfect. Thre's gotta be a little rain sometimes. This rain can be a warm shower that gives one courage and strenght or it may pe cold as ice and freeze one's thoughts. I think I have experienced both. I am no guru of nothing, it's just me with my thoughts trying to penetrate the cruel world that awaits me. At this point I only have question in my head?.How was it until now? Why? Towards what? For how long? With whom? What's behind door number two? Can i gamble with faith, trick her somehow to wisper something in advance?...I guess not, it's just that...there's gotta be a little rain sometimes!